When Faith Meets Suffering-Part 14
Welcome back to When Faith Meets Suffering with Trench Classes United and Kim-Evinda. We understand that social media is sort of like that “in love” stage of a relationship, the “happier” side of life. For many, it’s a sort of pretend world. While we get that trouble and tears don’t make for a good blog, we pray that as she walks through this season transparently, you will be encouraged when you walk through a difficult time of any measure, remembering who walks with you. Let’s get back to the story.
As she sat with Betty and watched a movie, her mind replayed his short and awkward visit just hours before and his empty promise to her as he said good-bye “We’ll do something fun tomorrow.” He promised to call her before going to bed that night.
But as the minutes turned into hours, she realized those words that had felt like a consolation prize for the disconnect they had earlier were truly an escape. He was running from something, and in her gut she knew this. She just wasn’t quite sure how deep he had gotten himself involved with the one who was pulling him from her.
He didn’t call her and as she got ready for bed, she tried calling him not once but twice. She was trying desperately not to be so desperate. FAIL.
Before turning off the light and beginning what had become her sleep aid, praying herself to sleep, she texted him to say good night. She slept…but fitfully for just a couple of hours. At 1:30 she woke up, the pain of it all her constant companion, and reached for her phone. He had texted her at 12:35: “Sorry, I didn’t see my phone. I was at Ty’s.”
She didn’t buy it for one minute and determined in her mind that she would call Ty the next day to uncover yet another lie. She let go of her instincts that screamed where and with whom he had been, surrendering them to God, and then she slept.
The next morning was Sunday and she was ready to hear from God himself but looked forward to hearing from Jack Hibbs and being in that safe place where it was easier to focus, turn off the pain. But her thoughts and frustrations and even anger threatened to follow her into the sanctuary and as she prepared to get in her car, she heard “Trust in me with your whole heart and lean not on your own understanding.”
And still her pain did not relent and followed her into the sanctuary. As she tried to worship, she heard His voice again: “Give me your whole heart; you don’t have to give it to him but give it all to me and I will guide you.”
Friend, to suffer long doesn’t mean we have to understand the why, only the how. Is there something you need to surrender so as to not lean on your own understanding?
Join us next week for more of this journey.